Today I learned that if you want to make a video record of the instructions for maintaining a pool then don't give the camera to your wife when she's standing next to her equally gobby sister and the manic female realtor. As Greg was telling me about how to vacuum the pool and where to attach the goddam piece of equipment, here's what the mic' will have picked up:
Realtor: OK I GOTTA GO NOW. I GOTTA TAKE (*unintelligable gibberish*)
Saba: SO YOU THINK I SHOULD PUT THE WHITE COUCH IN THE FAMILY ROOM? WHAT ABOUT THE HUTCH? I THINK IT WOULD LOOK GOOD ON THE RIGHT HAND WALL, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
Tazeen: NO NO! YOU NEED TO PUT THAT HUTCH IN THE KITCHEN NOOK! YOU DON'T WANT TO BE DRAGGING PLATES FROM THE FAMILY ROOM TO THE KITCHEN! ARE YOU MAD??
Greg: ....then just switch it on and you're done ok? Nothing to it.
Yeah sure Greg, it'll be a piece o' piss. I don't think we'll be going swimming any time soon, but at least I know where to put the fuckin' HUTCH! Oh, and I'm sure I'll enjoy the view of the grain in the pool deck that Saba was taping while you were showing me where to plug the vacuum in.
I'll be fine, *sigh*.
Next time I'll hire a deaf mute to hold the bloody camera.
G'night wench ;-)
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1 comment:
LOL!!!!!!!! LOL!!!!LOL!!!!
That was great blogging faddah! You're in the swing! :-)
Some pool advice: Call the pool store. Here it's called "The Pool Doctor" They have people who will open your pool for a hundred dollars.They take the cover off, put the chemicals in and scrub the winter off the walls of it. They walk you through it and answer all your questions. I never used that service but Richie has because he's a lazy Libra. ;-)
The micro manager always took care of the pool.I just vacuumed the thing every day. Realtors are usually not helpful once they get their 6% commission. Call the pool doctors and teach the kids how to maintain the pool. Good idea?!!
Don't be a house slave like me! LOL!!
Have a good time in your new world O'Malley. There's lots to see.
XOXO
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